Once you have children, there are a few things that change. I am not just referring that that beautiful thing that you once called a waistline or those lazy Sundays in bed that required only a tee shirt, a spouse, and water. So clear your heads… but that would be a great topic of discussion for a later date!
One thing that has changed for me is the frequency with which I go out to eat. And even when I eat out, the quality of the food is lacking. So I have been asking myself lately:
Does the birth of a child have to be the death of a quality life style?
The answer is: No!
We see a lot in the news and on the web about frustrated parents who don’t feel they have an outlet from their children. I’ll admit that a lot of my lack of time away from my child is self-imposed. I am really nervous about getting a sitter and going out. I am sure that, like me, most parents, asking the question:
Who can I trust with my child?
I have gone out less since I moved to the United Kingdom because I am away from everyone whom I know and trust to babysit. Here, leaving someone with my child would be like hiring a stranger.
I am also one of those parents who think they need to be able to go places. My child is in the: “I cannot really sit still and I have a million questions I have to get in before noon” stage. She is well behaved but she has a lot of energy. I find myself getting frustrated that I cannot eat my mediocre meal at a family restaurant without filtering questions about fairies, cat, dogs, Legos, and whatever distraction is out the window.
So it is time to build a babysitter list!
Do you have a list of babysitter that you use? How did you compile this list? I’d love to hear from those who, like me, are away from family and friends who fit the babysitter list to a tee.
Leaving your children can be stressful. When you walk out your door and trust your precious gifts to another person, you want to make sure that you have made the right choices. Some great choices for sitters are:
ü Mom and Dad ~ Grandparents love to have time with their grandchildren!
ü Siblings ~ Auntie and Uncle time is always a good time for both child and adults.
ü Good friends ~ If you have a best friend, she might be willing to trade a couple of nights a month with you for a date night or just “Mommy needs a couple of hours alone!” time.
ü Teenagers in the neighborhood ~ There is always a teenager in the neighborhood that babysits. Ask for recommendations for neighbors that you trust.
ü Babysitting services ~ Most major cities will have babysitting services with certified and background-checked sitters to sit with your child.
ü Parents’ Night Out ~ If your child belongs to an afternoon program, some of them will have a Parents’ Night Out program where you can drop your child and leave them until 10 p.m. or midnight to allow parents to get out.
ü Daycare provider moonlighting ~ Some daycare providers will moonlight. Ask at your local daycare if any of the providers provide day care service on their own time.
ü Moms from moms’ groups ~ If you belong to a mom’s group, ask around. Some moms sit as a means of supplementing their family income.
ü Godparents ~ If you child has Godparents, consider asking them if they would give you a night out.
Getting an occasion parents’ night out can really benefit the entire family. It allows the parents to rejuvenate.
Every parent need to get away—even for a couple of hours. It does not mean that you love your child any less! It just means that you are human and need a short time to yourselves as a couple. Even our children at a young age will walk away and want to spend time away from the watchful eye of others. Don’t feel guilty if you need time away. You are fostering independence while also letting your child know that you can leave and they will be fine.
Every parent deserves a night out. The key to getting a night out is finding someone whom you can trust with your children, someone who is able to handle any situation that may arise when you are away. When you decide to venture out, make sure that you look for someone who can be a good babysitter so that you can enjoy your time away.
About Cynthia Tolbert-Wilson
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We usually find our babysitters at church. This way we know their family and what background they come from. Plus the fact that we know their parents, keeps the babysitters on their toes.
Hi Dawn,
What an awesome idea? Your local church is an awesome resource to find a quality sitter. Thank you for sharing with me. I never thought about that as we were looking for a babysitter in the U.K. We hired one of the teaching assistant from our child’s class. She is wonderful and we have to see her everyday so we knew she would be good.