
As you look at your life, what do you see? Have you made friends, been in love? Is your glass half full? Is your glass half empty?
It is funny how our lives changed as we get older and our views of what perfect entails are altered by time and experience. When you are in high school, the world is your oyster. There is nothing that you cannot be or cannot accomplish.
You are invincible. Unstoppable!
In college, you begin to define what you want in life. You train for a desired career and start to try on the opposite sex to figure out what who would fit best
After college, you begin to work. Hopefully, you get ahead and then, if you are lucky, you find the right person and get married.
When I was younger, I loved to write. It was my passionate. I would write about everything. What I loved to write about was this couple. She was the executive at a large firm in some big city. As I think back, I find it interesting that I never gave my character a city to live in, even though I can close my eyes right now and see every detail her city, her office, and her life.

The guy in this story was named Dave. He was this wealthy executive that happened to live in her building. The character was always working; she wanted to get ahead in life. She was in a bad relationship and had vowed that she would develop her professional life, instead, and not worry about love.
One afternoon, while she was sitting outside, she had this chance encounter with Dave. The relationship eventually turned hot and steamy. What I found interesting is that, once she fell in love with Dave, I stopped writing.
A couple weeks ago, I looked around for the flash drive with my 225-page book on it and realized that I could not find it. I don’t know where it is. I cannot believe it. I am hoping that it will show up but I was not bothered that I did not know where it was. That flash drive represents eleven years of my life! I don’t know where it is and I don’t really feel that upset about it. I should be because it is a big part of me!
As you look at your life, are you passionate about it? Have you lost 1, 2, 5, 10, 15, 20 years of your life?

When I was younger, I had several goals. I wanted to become a published author, get married, have three children, and buy an old house somewhere close to the city. I would drive my children to school, put them to bed early, make love to my husband on a big screened-in porch, drink red wine, and be blissfully happy.
Most of my goals, I did not accomplish. I am not angry about that. Life just did not turn out that way. This is another interesting statement: “Life did not turn out that way.”
What does that mean exactly? Does it imply that I did not have any control over my circumstances. Could it be that I had control and did not wait for that right situation to create my perfect bliss?
Sometimes, I think that life is like shopping. You go from store to store looking for something. You don’t quite find exactly what you are looking for right away. But, you feel that you need something. So, you go to the sales rack, and pick out something that you can leave with. You try it on. It does not look great. But, at least it fits. You walk up to the counter and purchase the item. I’ll bet you are asking:
How is shopping like the life you make?
If you did not wait until you could find the exact dress you are looking for, then your life becomes just like that dress you have in your closest with the 25% off tag on it. You felt you had to have something and, giving up hope of finding exactly what you wanted, you settled for one that fit, was okay, and had a 25% off tag on it.

Have you turned your life into a just-okay-and-it-fits sale item with a 25% off tag on it? If that is so, you have settled for only 75% of the life that you wanted and deserved—if you are lucky.
Some of you (maybe, including me) are living less than that. Bold statement, yes! Do many of think it? Heck, yes! Are you afraid to say? Afraid to admit it?
Bingo!
Now we are talking…….
Richly Middle Class Real Conversation for Real People






Cynthia, great article and analogy to life! Your posts are definitely interesting and very easy to relate to. Miss you!
Heather
Hi Heather,
Thank you so much. It is interesting when you think of your life as a shopping experience isn’t it? And if you think of yours that way, I will have to say you are a SAK girl all the way!
I love this post Cynthia… Boy can I ever relate.
I was engaged to be married to the love of my life back when I was 27. We had been together for five years and everyone knew how much in love we were. He called the wedding off five weeks and two days before we were to walk down the isle. I had my life all mapped out. We already had house plans and were looking for where we wanted to build, I knew I wanted two kids and we were so excited about our future.
Life didn’t turn out how I expected. I was crushed and furious for a long time. That why me crap floated around for years. One day I realized that I have to create my own life now. Know what! My glass is running over all the darn time.
I did get married but divorces shortly after and never had children. I’m still alone after all these years but I’m so darn happy it ought to be against the law.
Thanks for sharing this with us and I do hope you found that flash drive. That would be a shame to have lost it but we know it’s not the end of the world.
~Adrienne
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Adrienne recently posted…Taking Responsibility For Your Lack Of Success And Where You Need To Start
Hi Adrienne
I am sure that was a devastating blow to have the wedding called off. That would have rocked my whole world too. The platinum lining to me is that you realized that you were in charge of your life. I think that is the thing that most people really struggle with; once something happens they forget they have a responsibility to themselves and their happiness to be pick up the pieces and begin again. I am so happy that you are happy that is what makes all the difference in life single or married.
Cynthia
Love this piece! It really makes sense and never thought about it like that. I will have to pay more attention next time I shop and see what I come up with. I think many probably do not wait for the perfect moment or thing and move along – very interesting indeed!
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Lisa recently posted…New – Is It Really New Or Just Improved?
Hi Lisa,
Thank you so much. I will agree that we have turned into a society of people that think that we have to settle because they perfect thing might not come along. I am guilty of that myself.
Cynthia